Returning to Us
To help people who help people, the organization needs to be healthy and have practices in place that consider the trauma of those they serve. Lauren Spigelmyer and Jessica Doering have helped thousands of people who help people all over the world. Each week they'll explore tools, insights, and stories to help you lead and live with more clarity, calm, and connection. If you’re looking for support as you grow your organization’s capacity for caring for staff and the community, we would love to be part of that journey.
Returning to Us
Part 1: Behavior isn't the Problem
In this episode, Lauren focuses on why behavior isn't the problem. Behavior is a signal that we need to interpret. She challenges us to ask a different question when seeing extreme behaviors- I wonder what happened that is driving that behavior? There is likely a need under all of that behavior. She talks about why traditional approaches that focus on controlling the behavior don't work. We need to get to the root of the behavior. What needs are driving this behavior and what interventions should I put in place to alleviate that problem. Expression of feeling is appropriate. When you meet the root cause of the need, the behavior will gradually become less and less. The more I try to control a behavior the more it escalates. When you learn to communicate in a way that understands the behavior you began to build trust with your students and your own children. Try to shift from what's wrong with you/why are you doing that to what's under this/ what's the need and once the need is known what can I do to respond to the need either preventatively or reactively.
Other related resources from Five Ives:
Blog Post:
- Why Traditional Employee Wellness Programs Fail (And What Works Instead)
- Survive Mode: Recognizing When Your Organization is in Crisis
- What are the Five Ives?
Podcast:
- Hive- The Last Stage of the Five Ives
- Thrive- The Fourth Stage of the Five Ives
- Strive- The Third Stage of the Five Ives
- Revive- The Second Stage of the Five Ives
- Survive- The First Stage of the Five Ives
- What are the Five Ives?
- A Five Category Regulation Framework - Five Ives!
- Using Our 5-Category Regulation Framework in the Workplace
- Impacting Organizational Culture: Explaining the First 2 Ps
- Impacting Organization Culture: Explaining the Second 2 Ps
Our Online Programs:
Subscribe to our mailing list and find out more about Stress, Trauma, Behavior and the Brain!
- Check out our Facebook Group – Five Ives!
- Five Ives Website website
- The Behavior Hub blog
If you’re looking for support as you grow your organization’s capacity for caring for staff and the community, we would love to be part of that journey.
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